KYLE, GO GET DEREK. And who are these Sabres?

Okay, so I'm totally excited about the win last night.  Like, completely.  But I'll talk about that later since it's Cari + Derek = Fate time.  And since I couldn't really get over the shock that my question was picked last week, and being exhausted from exploring Boston, I didn't really have the time to post about it last week in detail, but this week I do!!  That is, if I don't cram some more for my anatomy exam...

OH, BUT WAIT:  HE'S OVERSLEPT.  Story of my life.  (Derek, get your ass out of bed and call Kiss 98.5 right now...  Nick and Janet are contemplating calling "Derek's best friend" Kyle to wake him up...  HAHAHAHAHAHA Kyle.)

And lovelies?  I apologize for how ADD-ish this post is...  I'm half paying attention to what I'm writing, and half concentrating on the radio to see hear Derek...  Because what would a post of mine on Thursday be without the Derek Roy Report?  Just another post.  And frankly, I think my Thursday posts are absolutely ridiculous, and I love being absolutely ridiculous.

Alright, so maybe I will discuss the game for a bit...

WTF was up with that game, though, honestly?  ADAM SCORES, TIMMMAAY SCORES, AND HANK SCORES??!!  AND PETEY FIGHTS...  TWICE IN 12:01?????

Um, can this happen every night?  But switch up the scorers every once in a while so Derek and the rest have a job in blue and gold come September 2009?  Adam's seemed to excel this year, a little bit.  He's now got 4 points (3-1) in 15 games, when his career highs were in 2003-04, with 6-14 for 20 points.  Yeah, I think he'll have no problem hitting those marks if the team keeps in up.  And Timmy???  6 points in 5 games?  Okay.  Just, stay out of Keith Tkachuk's way, alright??  AND HANK!!!  ily...  I really do.  You're just too cute with your little celebratory shimmy and your gigantic grin while you really punched every guy on the bench, and then this:

"That's the first time I ever got the first star, I just have to enjoy it right now."

And Petey?  You're equally as adorable because of this:

"If we're going by points it's not fair because I'm never going to get [a pigeon]."

Well now you've got one.  =]

Moving on.  Really, though, I told my dad when it was 3-0 that I'd be okay with St. Louis scoring IF AND ONLY IF it were Jay McKee that buried the biscuit.  But when Perron scored, I actually yelled at the TV, saying, "You're not Jay!  I didn't say you could fuck with Miller's goals against!!"  Ohhh, what fun.

OOOH let's talk about Timmy for a bit.  Did anyone else feel like saying "KEITH TKACHUK JUST DESTROYED TIM CONNOLLY????"  I thought it warranted it, at least.  If Tim had been hit like that last year, I honestly believe in my heart that he would have been on the ice for a good 10 minutes, motionless.  BUT THIS JUST PROVES THAT THE REAL TIM CONNOLLY IS NOT PLAYING THIS YEAR.  Because there is no way in hell that Tim bounced up off the ice like that and kept playing.  And the coaches realized they effed up because he left the game not much longer than that.  NOTICE IT???  Yes you did.  DON'T LIE.  You're only fooling yourself.  Jill knows my theory that Marek Zagrapan is filling in for TC, but I'm not so sure about that anymore, because Marek is pretty much adorable in person, and Tim is kinda repulsive, actually...  I'm not too sure who's filling in for him anymore...

And now Derek is 15 minutes late.  I don't think he's going to be calling Janet and Nick, but I don't want to leave my radio in case he does...  I'm pretty much disappointed in him, kinda like someone would be upset if their boyfriend didn't pick her up for their date, and they only get to go out once a week.  OH, WAIT, because I feel like the Derek Roy Report is like my weekly date with Derek.  Yeah, I know, I'm delusional, but I live with it alright, so I guess you can too.

During the game I kept voting for the All-Star game, which took forever.  There's too much traffic on too low of a bandwidth for that to go smoothly.  A webpage that would take about a second to load on my computer took 5 mintues.  So then I discovered the text message voting.  All you have to do is send the player's last name to 81812.  Standard rates apply.  AND I HAVE UNLIMITED, so you know that I'm going to be voting allllll day long.  I believe you get a confirmation text after every 10 votes.  (But if you send "Roy," you get a response that says "2 or more players match that name.  Reply 1 for Andre Roy, 2 for Derek Roy."  Well, duh, who do you think I want??  Stupid phone.)  But I got really annoyed when Derek cranked one off the post last night because I had just hit vote on my ballot.  I really said this, too:  "Derek, you idiot, I spend all night voting for you and that's what you give me?!?!?!"

Derek's turning out to be a terrible Sabres Boyfriend...  Kyle aside.

And I really think that maybe he's not going to be on the radio today.  Kinda upsetting because I set my alarm for 7:30 to ensure that I was going to have an acceptable attention span.  So I got up early for nothing.  THANKS, DEREK.  THANKS A LOT.

Well, he's now 45 minutes late, so I'm giving up.  Stupid Royzie.

Derock the Vote? NO? Well, okay, maybe just vote..

This morning, when I woke up, I expected to be able to vote my lovely Sabres into the All-Star Game.

HOWEVER,

instead of the NHL being normal and putting links or whatever up on nhl.com, the homepage, to allow people to vote, I had to be all sneaky-like and find the address in old articles. I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THAT THIS MORNING. Well, obviously I made the time, but at the moment it is 8:05 am and I have to leave no later than 8:45, and as Kim nows, it takes me a ridiculously long time to get ready this early in the morning. I move about as slow as molasses.

So since there is no interesting hockey news, go vote your cute little butts off for Derek, Tommy, Teppo, and Ryan!!

Oh, wait, I lied. BRIERE IS HURT AGAIN!!!! Why am I excited, you might ask? Well, I'm only hoping that his injury lasts him about two weeks, because I'm going to the Sabres/Flyers game next Friday, and I am not the biggest Briere fan.

And there's a slight possibility I might be going to the Blues game tonight. If not, I'll probably post during intermissions. If so, then I'll post when I return home. But PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE let Jay McKee play. It's not right to deprive Buffalo's fans of him. We still love him. At least Anne and I do.

Oh, and this is just too funny: AHAHHAHHAHHHA Gloria Gaynor is going to be on the Today Show this morning. Oh, how I wish I could stay home from lab to sing hear her sing "I Will Survive." Only the best karaoke song... EVER!!

IT'S JAY DAY!! Well, at least tomorrow is... Maybe.

I got all excited this morning when I realized that we play St. Louis tomorrow, because that means one of my favorite Prodigal Sabres returns to Buffalooooo!!!

Jay McKee is my first REALLY big Sabres love.  Before him,  there were Hasek (I was 5; don't judge me) and Brian Holzinger, but that was before all the hormones kicked in, so I think those were truly just hockey loves.  I mean, I did think Brian was absolutely adorable, which he is, but I didn't know anything about him, so it was purely because he was a Sabre.  But Jay?  Oh, I love Jay.  I once saw he and Marty Biron with their now wives at an *NSync concert.  You know, the one at the Ralph.  Anyways, my friend Colleen approached them only after Nicole and Anne Marie left, probably flocking to the bathroom, but she got a picture of them.  AND JAY WAS WEARING A VISOR THAT SAID PORN STAR.  I actually wouldn't doubt it.  I'm still madly in love with Robert Jay Alan McKee.  <3

So you can imagine my excitement when I looked at the schedule.  Now, normally I'd know what team we're up against next, but since these long breaks between games KILL ME, I try not to focus on the next game too, too much, because then I can't distract myself from my Sabres deprivation..  BUT, when I saw it was the Blues, I looked at my mom, and in some pathetic little voice, go, "awwww we play Jay!"

But then I found this.

UMMMMMMM WHAT?

THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY THAT YOU CAN HAVE ST. LOUIS PLAY IN BUFFALO AND RELEGATE JAY TO NATHAN PAETSCH STATUS!!!!  Has Murray completely lost his mind?  I think so.  Because if I have to sit through another Jay-less St. Louis game, I'll cry.  No, really, I will.

Now I'm all depressed.  Talk about high to low in 60 seconds.

BUT THERE IS SILVER LINING, because that article also brought out that Paul Kariya might now play??  That's fine by me since he's "hot like a firecracker," as Rick might say.

But also the Men's Journal is out now, and once I get off of my butt I might go to the store and pick it up.  And when I say I might, I will.  Most definitely.

I don't care if I'm not supposed to like Chris Drury anymore, he's so gosh-darned handsome.  So I don't care.  I'm going to buy it, and I'm going to enjoy it.  Besides, how could I not enjoy Henrik Lundqvist and (DUH!) Markus Naslund??!??  Enough said.

AND THERE IS NO INTERESTING HOCKEY NEWS.

Except for the fact that Mike Ryan got demoted to Albany.  NOT FAIR.  Of course he'd be in North Carolina while I was in Boston, and of course he wouldn't be in Albany when I drove through there, either.  NOT FAIR AT ALL.  But seriously, they couldn't have used a better picture of him?  I mean, his eyebrows look fantastic, but his hair is a little bit foofy...  Whatever, though.  HE HAS A JOB, and that's all that matters, and now MJ is very, very, very close to him, so yay.

Alright.  I'm going to go buy some new CD's, and I'm going to go buy Men's Journal, and enjoy the beauty of NHL players for a little while, in order to forget that the Sabres aren't playing tonight, at least for a little while.