Musical Goal Crease, Anyone?

So I'm absolutely sure that, by now, you've all heard about the trials and tribulations of the Sabres in net, which are absolutely atrocious at the moment.

Here's our depth chart for netminders:

Ryan Miller (ankle sprain)
Patrick Lalime (flu)
Adam Dennis (hip, surgery)
Jhonas Enroth
John DeCaro (broken collarbone)

Oh, and there are two others (Bradley Eidsness, who is playing for the University of North Dakota, and Nick Eno, who plays for Bowling Green), but since neither of the two have pro contracts, I don't know what it would take to get the co-eds up here (Eno just turned 20, by the way, and Eidsness is only 19).

But that provides us with quite the quandary of who might end up in net this evening, if Lalime cannot play, and if (God, please, no) should Enroth go down.

There are three situations that would happen to the Sabres tonight if I were Lindy Ruff:

(1) Lalime is miraculously better, and suits up, 100%, and Enroth backs him up. (Best possible scenario.)

(2) Since Lalime is good enough to play, but not 100%, start Enroth, but have Lalime assume his usual position on the bench as team cheerleader.

(3) If Lalime is a no-go, put Enroth in net.

Who would play second-string in Number 3, you ask?? No one.

That's right; I said no one.

Think about this for a minute: Each team is allowed to dress 20 players, goalies included, right? Well, what if we only dressed one goalie? Then we could dress 19 skaters.

I specifically remember asking questions about this scenario to my parents many, many times when I was younger. In fact, I can hear myself up in Section 325, looking down at Dominik Hasek in net, Martin Biron on the bench, turning to my father and asking, "What happens if Dom and Marty get hurt in the same game?"

His answer? "One of the other guys would have to play goalie."

So that's why I say that. Hey, for all we know, Enroth could steal the show. I honestly think that could be the most interesting thing to happen in a hockey game in a while. I mean, who plays with only one goalie?

Because I don't necessarily trust any of our defensemen to play goal all that well, so why waste them as a benchwarmer?

Seriously, would you want Lydman, Tallinder, Paetsch, or anyone, for that matter, between the pipes with the way they've been playing lately? I sure as Hell wouldn't.

But if it came down to it, I say put the biggest body in the net, if necessary. None of these guys really have experience playing goal, let alone against Eric Staal and the Hurricanes. (Is Mike Ryan still with them? I'm too lazy to look right now...) So put the guy with the most meat in there and more net is covered.

My, my, my, this could become quite comical. I think I'm kind of glad I won't be home to see anything until the third period...

MY PLEA.

Is it over?

Now don't go calling me dramatic; don't say I'm going overboard and being way too worrisome. I don't want to hear it. Just give me my answer, damn it.

Is the world as I know it going to end Wednesday night?

I'm skeptical, at best, when considering where the Sabres could have ended up this year, even could still. But losing Tommy is such a huge blow, I'm not sure that we can maintain our pace without him.

He has 13 points in the last 10 games, either including or not including the game against Ottawa, in which he played only four shifts. But his 52 points in 54 games... That's what we're going to miss.

Connolly and Stafford are hot right now, and no doubt can shoulder the team for maybe the next week. We won't survive in February and early March if others--namely, Roy, Pominville, Hecht, and Paille--don't start playing to their full (and in some cases, not even half of their full) potential.

But, at the moment, I really feel a big void in my heart, because (and this is just the pessimist in me) I can see the playoffs slipping away. And I hate that, because I want to be all kinds of hopeful and positive, but I just can't be at the moment. I love me some Thomas Vanek. But what I love more is playoff hockey. Better yet, Sabres playoff hockey. So I'm going to be the typical Buffalonian now, and just have feigning hope of a chance at post-season glory.

Even so, you know I'm all secretly hoping we win it all, overcoming all adversity, and sticking it to those who said we couldn't.

So please, Derek, Drew, Jason, Jochen, Tim, and Danny, please hold on for dear life. I don't think I can take another summer without you boys.

(Oh, and Loves? How was the Catwalk For Charity? Wonderful Jill's amazing husband sent me a fabulous picture of Princess D serenading you... SO JEALOUS. I can't wait until next year! Damn cops and your following the rules and carding people...)

I'M CONVINCED

Seriously. Maria Genero has totally won my heart over...

...for Henrik Tallinder. (Don't even get me started on Genero. I've said it before, I want her job, and I'd stop at nothing short of lumping her up to get it. That is, if I weren't afraid of the ensuing arrest.)

Really, though, I've always liked Hank and thought he was a decent enough defenseman. And it didn't hurt that during practices or whatever he always, always is smiling, and you can often her him shouting in celebration or just because they're having fun. And that's what I want from the Sabres. I want them to play well, but I want them to have fun.

Everyone knows that when you're having fun and you're getting satisfaction from your job or task at hand, than you'll perform better while doing it. So if the Sabres are having fun, then they'll most likely be playing a hell of a lot better than we've seen out of them this season.

Anyways, I just thought it was adorable during the Sabres Show, when Henrik was talking about sledding with this wife Ann(e) and their children Nathan and Amelie. He smiled and went all cute and sentimental on us when he said he loves to hear the kids giggle.


Come on, now. Big collective AWWW. =]

But that's only the first part of my conviction.

The rest has to do with the long-term injuries suffered by Teppo Numminen (fractured jaw) and Andrej Sekera (ankle).

I've been saying it for weeks: The Sabres somehow needed to devise a defensemen rotation of sorts. Yes, before you even say it, I know it would screw up the pairings and the chemistry, blah blah blah, but we all know that our defense corps tend to break down and fall apart (i.e. every single one gets hurt) from the middle of the season, down through the stretch, and into the playoffs.

(I honestly believe that, had Jay McKee not contracted a ridiculous staph infection in his leg, due to a laceration from his pads, we would have a Stanley Cup banner in the rafters at the HSBC Arena.)

But now Chris Butler is really going to know what it's like to be a regular NHL player. Teppo Numminen is not going to be there to show him the ropes now, and he's going to have to step up even more than he has already to carry this team. Yes, I said carry this team. Out of the six defensemen that are going to be dressing now, I believe that Butler is the most consistent and most reliable. At least he has been since he was called up before Christmas.

And Nathan Paetsch?

I've been saying all along that Lindy Ruff needs to change the ways he deals with his seventh defenseman and his back-up goalies. If they have one bad game, they never again see playing time. You can't expect a guy who sits about 10 games or more to come back to the lineup and play better than your starter(s). It just won't happen. They either have to be played more often, or given a string of two, maybe three, games, depending on who it is (i.e. position).

Lindy did it last year with Thibault, and he's doing it this year with Lalime.

The sad thing is, this thinking and method has seeped it's way up to the press box, which has become much like a prison for Paetsch, I'm sure.

No matter how many bag skates this guy does, no matter how many extra minutes he logs with James Patrick, no matter how many times he hits the stationary bikes, he is not going to be used to game-play. It just won't happen.

I can only hope that Nathan has a good game tonight. Well, actually, whether he does or not is slightly irrelevant, because no one is going to be getting a flight from Portland to Buffalo any time soon. Not a defenseman, at least. Mike Weber has been injured for some time now, and Mike Funk is recuperating in his hometown of Abbotsford, BC while he recovers from his second concussion since training camp of this year. (The first was suffered during camp, I believe the opening day. He returned from that on November 7, 2008, which just so happened to be the night I was there. The second concussion was suffered from a vicious hit from behind into the boards (which I still can't find video of), mid-December. Funk has only played in 13 of Portland's 37 games.) Out of the other d-men there, only two have seen any time up in Buffalo (Mike Card and Marc-Andre Gragnani, the latter used to play as a winger).

So like I said, hopefully Paetsch will have been worked in practice hard enough to be near game speed. I really hope he does well, because I'd hate to see him go. And the likely scenario is that he will if he doesn't play well.

Die By The Blade has already furthered the trade rumor that could be bringing in veteran Mathieu Schneider to bolster the blue line in exchange for the mostly unwanted Maxim Afinogenov.

Could something along these lines happen? It will be interesting to see which rumors turn out to be actual moves once the trade deadline passes. But if this one does go through, the Sabres will be in a rut as far as bodies go. We've got too many defensemen, but most of them are very young. I'm anxious to see what Darcy and the management will do, come February and March.

Anyways, Go Sabres! (And Derek? Remember what I said about no friends on the ice. You shouldn't even be friends with Greg Campbell off the ice, so definitely no niceties on the ice.)

Oh, and I just feel the need to tell you that Thomas Vanek giggles like a girl, and he and Drew Stafford stuck Butler with the bill at Chef's on Saturday. He laughed it off when asked about it, but still. Way to treat the rookies like that.

THE RETURN OF TIM CONNOLLY AND THE D.R.R., AND RUMORS IN PORTLAND

No one is happier than this girl to not only see this face again, but to see it bearing a grin.


Alright. Now that I've gotten that out of the way... Seeing as how Timmmmaaaay is returning tomorrow night, I thought it might be interesting to examine his case.

If you asked me if I could sum up Connolly's career in one word, I'd chose unfortunate, the definition of which states that it is something marked or accompanied by or resulting in ill fortune. Tim Connolly is incredibly gifted and is a fantastic hockey player, but the poor guy has had more injuries that I can count.

The serious ones began back in his junior year, while playing down the 90 in Erie, with the Otters. In the 1998-99 season, Connolly broke his leg during a game, resulting in a rod being placed in his tibia.

This injury hardly affected his draft status, as the New York Islanders took him fifth overall that year. Despite just coming off of his broken leg, Connolly made the team out of camp. He played 81 games in his rookie season, recording only 10 goals, but snagging 20 assists for 34 points on the year. Not too shabby for a rookie, especially in the Old NHL, but more would definitely be expected of a first-round pick.

In his sophomore season, Connolly appeared in all 82 games, this time posting 10 goals, but 31 assists, improving his points total to a high 41.

The summer after that season, Tim was attending the high school graduation of his younger twin sisters, Caitlin and Shannon. Their graduation coincided with the second day of the NHL Entry Draft. Connolly admitted being excited, due to NYI's acquisition of Alexei Yashin and Chris Osgood, and since the first day is usually when the wheeling and dealing occurs, he was completely shocked when GM Mike Milbury called--during the ceremony--to tell him that he and Taylor Pyatt had been sent packing to Buffalo, in exchange for Mike Peca.

So, Connolly suited up in the red and black. In his first season for the Sabres, Connolly again played all 82 games, but struggled to produce, improving on his previous totals, but hardly significantly. He scored 10 goals again, and tallied 35 assists, heightening his points total by four to 45.

In his fourth career season--second with the Sabres--Connolly severly underachieved, only netting 12 goals and 13 assists, for 25 points. Tim appeared in 80 games, and only missed the last two of the season due to a suspension, warranted due to swinging a stick at an opponent.

At this point in time, Tim looked reliable, at least health-wise. He was one of the leading Iron Men in the league, playing over 300 straight games (I believe he had a run of over 320, but I can't find the exact number, and I think that put him at third in the rank).

But it all went downhill from there.

In the preseason of the 2003-2004 season, the Sabres were playing an exhibition game against the Chicago Blackhawks. This is what Tim had to say:

I took a mid-ice, shoulder-to-head hit with Scott Nichol from the Blackhawks. It was a clean hit, but I had just taken a shot, so I was in a vulnerable position where I couldn't really brace myself. I didn't get knocked out, I skated to the bench, but I was out of it. My legs gave out a little bit. I had never suffered a concussion before, but it was one of those situations where it wouldn't go away. It took more than six months before my head was clear and I was able to work out and get back in the swing of things. (From ESPN.com)

Needless to say, as I'm sure you're all well aware, Tim missed that entire season.

Cue the lockout. Tim opted to play in Switzerland, with HC Lugano. There, he played 16 games, had seven goals and three assists. His stay in Europe was cut short, though, due to a knee injury.

So Tim returned to New York, and rehabbed his knee to be sure that it would be ready for the upcoming NHL season.

In 2005-2006, Connolly was limited to 63 games in the regular season, due to a controversial knee injury. This happened when Darius Kasparaitis, then of the New York Rangers, checked Connolly low, causing him to miss time. In this season, though, Connolly recorded 16 goals and 39 assists, combining for 55 points, career highs across the board. At this point in time, he was registering .87 points per game. Hardly anything to sneeze at.

In his first playoff appearance, Connolly only played in 8 games, but registered five goals and six assists for 11 points, which would be 1.375 points per game. He did not conclude the Sabres' playoff push with them, though, because he suffered a second concussion, thanks to a vicious, but clean, hit, from the Ottawa Senators' Peter Schaefer, now with the Boston Bruins.

Because of problems thought to be related to his second concussion, Connolly sat out all but the last two games of the 2006-2007 season. In those last two games, he recorded one goal.

In the playoffs that year, though, Tim played 16 games, recording nine assists.

On to the 2007-2008 season. Connolly struggled throughout the year with bone spurs in his hip, which eventually required surgery. He suited up for only 48 games, scoring only seven goals, adding 33 helpers, but in the end only posted 40 points. Obviously more is needed from Connolly, whose points per game total for the season then sat at .83.

Thus far this season, Connolly has had fractured vertebrae and a broken rib, limiting him to only six of the the Sabres' 40 games. In those six games, though, Connolly has put up two goals and five assists, for a points per game average of 1.167.

None of this goes to show how skilled Connolly is, though. He has long been Ruff's PP QB, and always sees ice time on the PK. His teammates will always say how gifted he is, and how difficult he can be to play against.

But what do his numbers really mean to us? Why is he valuable to this team?

Let's allow his career totals to do the talking, shall we? In the nine seasons Connolly was with an NHL team (the season he missed due to concussion symptoms and the current season included), he's only played 444 of a possible 696 games (only 63.8%). In those games, he's recorded 72 goals and 176 assists, for a total of 248 points. That's only an average of .558 points per game, which would equate to 45.8 points on a season.

Like I said, I love Tim Connolly more than the next Sabres fan. I have since we acquired him, but that's a whole 'nother story. My point is, his numbers suck. They definitely do not portray the player we all know Connolly has the potential to be. The problem is, he is so injury-plagued that he probably will never live up to his own expectations, let alone ours.

But I'm glad to see he'll be back tomorrow. Our power play sure as hell needs him, and it wouldn't hurt to have a center who can really see the ice and find good passing lanes out there.

The question remains, how much longer will Timmy be wearing blue and gold? Will he be gone by the trade deadline? Is he going to leave that day? Over the summer? Or will he stay with us? Your guess is as good as mine, seeing as how Afinogenov is a bigger problem, and Kotalik would probably garner the most interest from other teams. It doesn't hurt that the coaching staff loves Connolly. If he does stay, though, he'd better be willing to take a sizeable pay cut, because there is no way, talent aside, that a guy that injury-riddled deserves a salary of $2.9 million per season.

*****

Speaking of trades, there are rumors spreading up in Portland. They've hit a snag this season with goaltending, as Adam Dennis recently required season-ending hip surgery. That means Jhonas Enroth has been shouldering all of the duties, now coming up on his (I believe) 11th game in a row.

Their need of a goalie, combined with the Sabres' supposed interest in keeping Chris Butler (we'll see about that one) and Matt Ellis up in Buffalo, would obviously present the Sabres with a predicament. In order to keep extra bodies up in the NHL, they'd have to clear roster space. The obvious bodies to move would be Afinogenov and Paetsch, Max for obvious reasons, and Paetsch because he's the odd man out. Kotalik and Connolly could also be moved due to contract years, but that's hardly likely; Kotalik is a force on this team, and Connolly has virtually no stock.

Maine Hockey Journal reported that Kevin Dineen, the coach of the Portland Pirates, had some interesting sound bytes one the subject, suggesting the Buffalo brass have something in the works:

"(Goalie search) has been put off for a reason and won’t be clarified til Friday at the earliest,” said Dineen.

It'll be interesting to see what happens, that's for sure.

*****

And seeing as Derek Roy actually called up Kiss 98.5 this morning, I can tell you what he had to say. Honestly, though, I think this is the first actual D.R.R. in about a month, mostly due to the holidays falling on Thursdays...

- Andrew Peters' thumb is bruised, was bleeding yesterday, and it still hurts.
- Derek suggested that Andy's fingers taste like chicken wings.
- He says you shouldn't bite people unless your life is in danger. Nick added, "Unless you're on Chippewa."
- He's excited to play against Chris Drury.
- Is he doing anything differently? No. He's sticking with his system.
- VitaminWater flavor? Endurance/Mango.
- Sometimes works out after games.
- January has a ridiculous travel schedule. He may just leave his suitcase packed.
- Doesn't have any pets.
- Did he send a baby gift to Rob Ray? No.
- He was 3 when he first skated. His brothers were about that age as well. He was awful, falling everywhere. Couldn't stop until he was "like 10 years old."

Finally, he called them, and finally some oddball information.

Well, kids, it snowed again. Big surprise. I'm off to shovel, and the hopefully I'll feel spry enough to head to the gym. That's my plan, at least. I'll be back if I hear any juicy information.

NECESSARY NOTES

I'm going to take the time this gloomy, windy Sunday afternoon in "wild Western New York" to write thank you notes while watching the Bills game, as well as write a few needed letters to deserving ones across the NHL.



Dear Derek,

I don't know what has gotten into you, but it has got to stop. I mean, it's bad enough that you didn't score on Monday for my birthday, but then you completely forgot to get me a present either for my 20th or Christmas, you don't make up for it against Washington, and then you play as terribly as you did last night to top it off? Puh-lease. Derek, I don't know what to do about you. I figured when Kim saw you across the street from the mall on Tuesday that you were, for sure, going shopping for me, but I guess you were just indulging yourself. But just let me say this: If I find out that you were eating lots and lots of Christmas cookies and turkey, instead of tofu brownies and tofurkey, you're in trouble Mister. And truly, if you refuse to shoot the puck--especially on a two-on-one--on Tuesday, I'm breaking up with you again. And believe me, I'll do it.

Love, Cari

*****

Dear Tommy,

So I see you're now on the third line... That upsets me. Not because you're on the third line due to injury, but because you're hurt. And it's obvious. You weren't taking strides if it wasn't necessary, and you don't seem to have that burst of intensity that you had a couple weeks ago. I'll make you some cookies and leave them on your doorstep. Maybe that will help. But, on second thought, Ashley might not appreciate some random girl baking cookies for her man. I'll leave that up to her, then. But seriously, though, get well soon, Tommy. The Sabres need Atlas.

xoxo, Cari

*****

To Paul and Patty K:

I saw you two last night. Paul, you looked positively smashing in your black suit. Very nice. But Pat? What was with the beanie? I mean, I know that it's cold in the arena, and yeah, you looked cute, but still... It kind of defeats the purpose of wearing a suit and tie if you're going to put a winter hat on indoors. Whatever, though. I still enjoyed knowing that you were sitting directly behind me.

Hoping for you speedy return, Cari

*****

Dear Portland Pirates,

I apologize that the Sabres' injury woes have hurt your position in the standings. Because once we took Mark Mancari from you, I believe in his absence, you only won two games. Sorry. And to make it worse, we now have Nate and Tim, which is only making a difficult situation worse.

Again, sorry. <3 Cari

*****

Dear Timmykins,

To Timmy C, I love and miss you. What's happening? Are you still hurt? Are you dead? Have you taken up residence in Childrens' Hospital, drawing with the children? Because that would be cute. But you could also have taken up residence at the bar at SoHo, drowning your sorrows in bottles of Skyy Vodka or Southern Comfort, and then going home with a different girl each night to disguise the pain... But I'd like to think of you as a really good human being, so I'm going to believe the former. Yeah.

To Timmy K, YAYYY!! I was so excited to read, as Kim pulled into my driveway last night, that you had been called up! And then you were in the starting lineup? Ahhhhh-mazing! I'm so proud of you, Shirley Temple! You played well last night, so we'll see how the rest of your stay with the Sabes goes.

Fondly, Cari

*****

Dear Sidney,

You're an asshole.

Love, Cari

*****

Dear Jay McKee,

I hope your finger can be saved. I don't like to think of amputations, in general, but especially not when they jeopardize the career of one of my all-time favorite hockey players, let alone Sabres. I just can't imagine a McKee-less NHL. And I don't want to see it anytime soon.

Best wishes, Cari

*****

Taylor Pyatt,

Maybe breaking your foot will teach you to not block shots from your teammates. I'll miss you, Bedroom Eyes.

--Cari

*****

To all hockey players,

You'd think you'd learned from Maxim Afinogenov's mishaps... HOCKEY PLAYERS SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO WARMUP BY PLAYING SOCCER. It should be banned.

Regards, Cari



I had other letters to write, but I just can't remember them at the moment. I keep getting distracted by the sounds of tree branches snapping and the Bills game. So I'm going to go watch the game, and I'll come back, possibly with a few more letters, tomorrow. Love...

OH, LIFE.

So Saturday night was pretty much awesome.. That is, until about 2 am, at which point Lucas and Jay decided to argue about which anatomical area on the male body fosters more bacteria: The groin, or the hands. And then they were arguing about when they should wash their hands--before or after they use the bathroom. WAY TO KILL A FABULOUS MOOD. They pretty much ruined the party. Oh well.

And then, I was planning on driving home, but since, in that particular area of Amherst we were in, you couldn't see out the front window of their house, I spent the night at Britt's, since she lives two minutes from there, and myself 15.

So yesterday morning, I found myself comfy in B's bed, trying to post from my phone. Alas, since Verizon has what I am sure is the worst mobile internet around, I had written my entire post, and THEN IT WOULDN'T LET ME. And I was too frustrated and tired and hung-over to write it again once I had come home.

But anyways, it mostly consisted of something like this (I'm going purely from memory, here, kids. Bear with me.):

WTF, SABRES. WTF.

See, now, I'm think I'm an extremely devoted person, when I want to be. So when I take the time to be devoted to a flailing hockey team, YOU TAKE IT.

I almost abandoned you, though. See, my 16-year-old cousin Trevor plays hockey for his high school. I almost took up cheering for his team full time instead of you, Sabres. Because his team is actually good. And he's my cousin, so I have to like his hockey team. But Sabres? You're making me want to like his team.

THAT IS, UNTIL I DECIDED TO BREAK UP WITH PRINCESS D, AND NOT PAY TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO YOUR GAME, AND INSTEAD GET DRUNK. THEN YOU DECIDE TO WIN.

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

But I'm glad you won. And I'm glad Derek scored. We're broken up until further notice. But just so you know, D, I want you back.

Just to prove that we do, in fact, belong together: At the party we were playing Fuck the Dealer. Now, the first deck of cards that Tom grabbed from somewhere in the house was a deck Luke had received when he went to Aces and Blades a couple years ago. I had never played this game before, so when my turn came around, I had no strategy, or anything. I just picked a number--8--and who was on that card, a winning card, mind you? DEREK ROY. FATE-TASTIC, FOR REALS.

But anyways, I don't really have much to say in the way of hockey. Nothing's really happened.

Oh... Wait. My Pirates.

So I'm sad that Marky Mark's stay in Buffalo has ended. Lindy really didn't utilize him correctly, but whatever. Moving on. GERBE DERBY!!! AHHHHHHHH. Enough said.

And my poor Mikey Funk... Remember how he had a concussion during camp, that he suffered on, like, the first day? Yeah, well when Kim and I were up in Portland for a game, it just so happened to be my love's first game back from the head injury. So Saturday night, who gets absolutely obliterated from behind into the boards? MIKE FUNK. Who has another concussion as a result? MIKE FUNK.


I'M SERIOUSLY GOING TO KILL ANSSI SALMELA IF I EVER SEE HIM ON THE STREETS. UGH.

I swear to God, if he becomes the next Tim Connolly/Brett Lindros/Pat LaFontaine in regards to bruised brains, I'LL SERIOUSLY CRY, because I love him.

Okay then. Now that I got that out of my system... I baked cookies last night for a friend, and then I made some special ones for Kim and myself, for our little soiree this evening.

If I could send cookies (the edible kind) through the internet, I'd have a big platter full of them for you all. But, since I can't do that, here's something sweet instead:

BACKGROUND INFO IS NECESSARY, THOUGH. Remember that picture that caused quite a ruckus in these parts recently?? Well, remember how we thought that it was one Clarke MacArthur that was grabbing the junk of one Derek Roy??

WELL IT WASN'T THE GENERAL, AND I HAVE THE PROOF.

Here's a snipet of the picture in question:


Notice the man on the left--supposedly Clarke MacArthur. Notice the writing on D's shirt. Also, notice the man to the right's striped green shirt.

Now take a look at this picture, which I got off of another Facebook account:


HMMM... RECOGNIZE ANYONE??

The guy in the green Fox track jacket and the green Von Dutch hat would be D's younger brother, Scott. Hmm, that other green shirt looks awfully familiar, doesn't it? And the guy next to Derek--supposedly Sparky--doesn't appear to look like Sparky at all, actually.

So there you have it, folks. Derek's sexuality status is still in limbo, but as far as I'm concerned, the second coming of the Man-Child is straight, and as innocent as can be.

LET'S GO BUFFALO!!!

NOW WHAT?

Yeah, so I'm sure you all know what's going on with a certain picture of a certain Derek Roy... But I'm not even going to say I'm sorry for the spread of that picture. You know why? First of all, it's his own damn fault, secondly, I did nothing wrong, and thirdly, it was with good intentions the most harmless of intentions possible.

So, Derek, just be glad we took the picture down, although it can be found elsewhere, now, from what I've seen...

Oh well. Next time, don't let your friends violate you in public, let someone else photograph it, and the let them put it on Facebook, where anyone can see it. Namely, me. Because you know I'm giving it to MJ.

Anyways, back to legit hockey blogging.

Toni Lydman is doubtful for tonight, as is Craig Rivet, apparently. So who would get the logical promotion from Portland? Mike Weber, obviously. But I guess he's been iffy, as far as health is concerned, so then who?

(Lindy doesn't seem too, too concerned about those issues, but still...)

Marc-Andre Gragnani, in 20 games, has 1 goal and 10 assists; also, he's a -1 with 16 penalty minutes.

Mike Kostka has 2 goals and 6 assists, also in 20 games, with 6 PIM, and he's a +8.

Chris Butler's points and games are the same as Kostka's, but he is a +2 with 14 penalty minutes.

My Mikey-Poo, Mr. Funk, has been limited to 11 games due to a concussion he suffered the opening day of training camp. But, in those 11 games, he's netted just 1 goal and 3 assists. He's racked up 8 penalty minutes and is a +3.

Paul Baier, whom I'm not sure we have rights to?, has 3 points (1-2) in 18 games, with a -2 and 12 PIM.

Weber has played 19 games, has only 2 assists to put towards his point total, and is a +5 with 51 PIM.

Mike Card has been limited to 13 games, most recently due to taking a puck off of his gorgeous face (please don't need plastic surgery). He's only got 1 assist, so far, on the year, and is an even 0 on +/-, with 16 penalty minutes.

I'm making my choice with the assumption that Weber is unavailable, fyi...

So, based purely on statistics, I'd probably want to call up Gragnani or Kostka. Based on playing style, comparable to Lydman, I'd probably go with Funk, because when I've seen him play in person, he's physical on the puck, and he can skate. Based solely on the fact that I adore him, I'd call Funker, as well.

But I'm kind of mad at him because he still hasn't accepted my friendship on Facebook... Then again, neither have Mancari or Dylan Hunter, so idk... What's with these Portland boys? Don't they check their Facebook 1,978,234,986 times a day like I do?? Well, at least Gerbe Derby does...

Anyways, I've come to the conclusion that blogging purely on the game is kind of boring. I like being ridiculous way, way, way too much.

SO.

I'm throwing this out there:


UMMMM WHAT??

Tommy, what the hell were you thinking when this picture was taken?? I'm not even going to talk about that RIDICULOUS hat.

Um, and what are you doing in that area of Buffalo???

Hmm, well, Shelby, that's for you.

But anyways, the Panthers? Stephen Weiss? Gregory Campbell? Not too intimidated. But Derek, seriously, forget that your friends with the later. Please. No nice guys tonight.

So I guess I'll miss probably half of the game. I've decided that if they're winning, maybe I won't watch the rest of it?? Because, I don't know, maybe it's me. I kind of take it personally when the Sabres are sucking, and get all bummed and mope around the house... I swear, if I slit my wrists, I'd covered in blue and gold goo. So maybe I won't watch/listen, just to see if that works... But I don't know if I can hold out like that. I've never intentionally ignored a game...

We'll see. Go Sabes!

Okay, seriously, I've got to stop this already.

There's only so many times that my theories can be right... I mean, it's just not a good sign for the world when I have these crazy ideas, and they actually hold true. IT'S DOWNRIGHT SCARY.

Did I not, yesterday, say that Derek probably pulled his groin while falling on the ground?

Well, my friends, I wasn't far off. Because, after conferring with dear MJ, we've come to the conclusion that D's latest ailment--BACK SPASMS--were suffered when he allowed his male counterparts (but not teammates) to carry him down Chippewa.

Geez, D, do you get any more predictable? Or outrageous?

Don't worry, though. I still love you.

And I'm even offering to be your beard. I'll aide you in your struggle to rebuild your reputation in the Buffalo Sabres Blogosphere, as well as mend your dignity and self-respect. And while I'm at it, I'll work to remove all threatening pictures of you from the internet, but then proceed to share them with the Blogosphere, because I could never keep something like what we've shared the past couple days from them. That'd just be cruel.

You know what else is cruel? The fact that my mother said this: "Cari, we'll know for sure that Derek's gay when he starts dating Sean Avery."

That's just cruel and unusual...

But, then, would that make D some of my least-favorite fashionista's "sloppy seconds?"

Avery, by the way, is probably the biggest tool ever known to grace the face of the Earth. That was completely uncalled for.

Oh, and has anyone heard anything about our favorite womanizer/man-whore?

Life, Jaroslav's Eating Habits, and Unanswered Questions

Here's the part where I complain about my personal life for a moment:

Okay, so we all know that I don't have the most glamorous job around--I change the diapers of the elderly, bathe them, and put them in bed. Not that spectacular, and pretty smelly, which is why I don't often go out after work. At least, if I do, I shower first, which means I don't go out until 1 am, which, in Buffalo, is not late at all, but still...

ANYWAYS, because I had to work last night, and then told a coworker that I'd cover her overnight shift, I couldn't go shopping this morning. I mean, not that I can really afford to spend my money unnecessarily, or anything... But I love shopping, and Black Friday shopping is like, the most fun ever.

So I'm a little bummed that I didn't get to go shopping, and now I'm running on four hours of sleep, and about to get ready to head back to work. And my supervisor even had the gall to ask if I'd do another double tonight. NO THANK YOU. I have plans for tomorrow. They're not that exciting, but it's stuff that needs to get done. I have to go to the post office and find a box big enough to fit a Sabres jersey and a container of cookies to send to Andy, I have to make the cookies (which Kim has so kindly offered to assist), clean my room, make preparations for Sunday's Bills/49ers' game, and, oh yeah, WATCH THE SABRES.

And then there's always the Sociology tests that I have to take online by the 17th, and the lab practical I have for Anatomy on Wednesday.

Yuck.

BUT BACK TO MY PURPOSE IN LIFE, TALKING ABOUT THE SABRES.

All of these videos about the boys and their Thanksgivings are just adorable.

I love how Patty's mom lays down the law and gives him a time to be at the 'rents house by. I also love how Jason got that sheepish smile when talking about Thanksgiving (which I think is extra cute because he still celebrates it even though his American mother and himself have lived in Canada for how long?), and how Jaro talks about his abilities to cook foul, when we all know all he really does is bite the head off, Ozzy Osbourne style. And I especially like his name pronunciation correction during the Sabres show (it's right after the commercial).



I really think that I adore that man.

In other news, I'm really hoping Tommy is okay. Because the more effect Milan Lucic is having on this team, the less I like him, and the more inclined I am to hurting him. And I really don't feel like going to jail anytime soon, so Tommy had best be alright. If he wants to sit out tonight, fine, okay. But not tomorrow. We need him tomorrow more than tonight, because, when it comes down to getting into the playoffs down the stretch, we'll need divisional points more than conference points. Therefore, Montreal on Saturday is more important.

Plus, once Al comes back healthy, who sits? Danny's supposed to be playing, so I don't necessarily see him sitting anytime soon, and I don't see the Sabres sending Mancari down in the near future. Well, at least they wouldn't have any legit reason for doing so...

OH!! And to the person who found us by searching for this:



I give you your answer. Also someone found this by searching for "Adam Cari Miller." What, did I all of a sudden marry Ryan Miller, and now we have a son named Adam? And no, for another person's inquiring mind, I do not know the colors of the Sabres' respective bedrooms, I do not love Maria Genero, I don't want to ship Derek off to Maine, I'm not friends with Garnet Exelby on Facebook, I've never seen Daniel Briere shirtless (nor do I want to), and I'm not going to trash talk Marky Mark's beautiful girlfriend. If you want to do that, and I suggest and beg that you don't, go over to those trashy forums. Because I don't have vendettas against the girls that the guys I love decided to go out with. I'm not a jealous bitch, so you've got no business being here if you want that (Can you tell that I can't stand those forums, no matter how addicting they are??).

Well, kids, I have to go get ready for work. Thankfully, though, the nurse I work with is awesome and likes the Sabres, too, so I never miss a game while I'm there. I'll post after the game if there's something good to talk about.

Housekeeping.

The Sabres need to learn how to do it, so they should take a lesson from me.


(1) As I'm sure you've noticed, I got bored with our layout/template/thing, so I freshened it up. And can I please tell you how obnoxious it is to mess around with Blogger's templates? They're all kinda ugly, or already being used, and since I like to be all cutesy with my stuff, and I don't like to copy people, I get really annoyed when you're only given a handful of options. Whatever, though.


(2) MARK MANCARI SCORED HIS FIRST NHL GOAL LAST NIGHT!!!!! I was soooo proud. We (the nurse I work with and myself) were watching the game at work, and she was laughing her ass off when he scored because I was awing, and saying "Aw, Mark, I love you! I'm so proud of you!" She said I looked like a doting mother watching her only daughter get married. BEST ANALOGY EVER.


I LOVE YOU.


(3) Derek scored again, finally. And he couldn't have done it at a better time, as far as I'm concerned, because, while I was driving to work yesterday, a guy from the Sabres Store called me, and left a message saying that my NEW THIRD JERSEY CAN BE PICKED UP ON WEDNESDAY. YAYYYYYY!! So now I take back saying that I wasn't too sure if I wanted his jersey anymore, because Princess D is starting to play better.


(4) When D scored yesterday, Kim texted me and said "he doesn't skinny dip, he chunky dunks." This is why I love her.


(5) Awesome reader Katie told me that she saw D eating spaghetti at Chef's yesterday, and that he eats like a pig. Now, I don't know about you, but I tend to view all the Sabres as perfect people, kinda like every girl's expectations of Mr. Right. So I never expect any one of them to shovel pasta into their mouth and let the mozzarella cheese that was melted all over it to stick to the plate as they chew a mouthful. So, Katie, as fantastic as that was, I'm going to forget you ever told me that, and go on living in my blissful, delusional world. No offense though. I still love you.


(6) I decided that I'm not going to comment on actual game-play until the Sabres start winning again.


(7) If the playoffs were to start today, we'd be out. That's depressing, considering the start we had.


(8) I totally called Timmy C's injury--BROKEN RIB. Called it. And I'm not one to say I told you so... Actually, who the hell am I kidding. I TOLD YOU SO!! =]


(9) I never commented on Paul's fish story. A-FREAKING-DORABLE. I hate worms too, but that's mostly because when I was little, my friend Kevin used to (AND I'M NOT KIDDING YOU. I SWEAR.) squirt chocolate syrup on them and eat them like spaghetti. At least Derek doesn't do that... But I don't like fish, either. My friend Kristle's dad used to fish all the time and he'd gut them in the backyard while we were laying out in the sun. Gross.


I leave you with my last comment of this Sunday, as I'm currently watching the Bills, leading the Chiefs. *crossing fingers* ...maybe??


(10) My dad made these up last night and sent them to me; they're absolutely hilarious, and you really should take the time to watch them all: Dance 1, Dance 2, Dance 3, Dance 4

Wow. Just, wow.

Last night, when the Sabres came storming out of the gate, I came up with a really nifty idea for my post-game post. AND THEN DEREK SCORED, and that post became a little bit better.

BUT THEN THOSE IDIOTS FELL APART AGAIN.

So my plan was shot to hell, and my heart shattered, and now I don't even know where to begin.


Well, I'll begin with Tim Connolly, I suppose.



I'm seriously worried about this guy. Like, even though I don't like to talk to my inside-the-Sabres source too, too much, because he really drives me crazy, I'm seriously tempted to call him and find out what's going on. BUT, I don't think he'd be able to tell me, but idk. If I decide it's worth him pestering me all the time, I'll give The Boy a call. Until then, we can speculate.

This is what Lindy had to say:

"Here's what I'll rule out: It has absolutely nothing to do with concussion; it has absolutely nothing to do with vertebrae. It's brand new.

"It's an injury that I don't want to explain. It's a tough one, and I don't want to explain it. I give him a lot of credit for muscling his way through one game. If it was a groin injury, I'd tell you a groin because nobody's going to go after his groin. If it's an injury where I really think somebody could target, you don't say anything."

IS THAT SUPPOSED TO HELP ME COPE, LINDY??? BECAUSE IT'S NOT WORKING. Now, I'll be the first person to rag on Timmy when he gets a stupid injury, or if he misses practice, or if he's found passed out on the floor of the Snooty Fox, but in all actuality, I LOVE HIM TO DEATH. And I'm not ashamed to admit it. It's embarrassing at times, yes, but even Danny Paille admitted that he has NKOTB on his iPod. Close enough.

And he thinks it's that bad, to the point that it's something that would make him a target?? Now, again, I'll be the first person to say that Timmy won't be here come July of 2010, BUT HE'S MY TIMMY. DON'T HURT HIM. Or you'll quickly find yourself on my Hockey Player Hit List. I'll have to tell you about it someday, but most of the people on it are there for knocking Tim into the next season.

Seriously, though, while reviewing a bunch of stuff for my Medical Terminology class, I decided to try to figure out what's really wrong with Tim. The only things "musculoskeletal" that I could come up with, having to deal with the upper body, that could present itself as "a bruised chest," were the following:

- BROKEN OR FRACTURED RIBS. That's any crack or break, anywhere on the bone of a rib. They usually take 1-2 months to completely heal, since there's nothing that can be done by a human to have any effect, really.

- COSTOCHONDRAL SEPARATION. These are a little more touchy. This occurs when the bone of the rib, in the middle ribs, separates from the cartilage attaching it to the sternum. Treatment for this can take up to 12 weeks, possibly more.

- The other possibility I can think of would be a cracked sternum. This would take a ridiculously long time to heal, just because of the thickness and strength of the bones in that area: the manubrium (the flatter, rounder, top portion of the sternum), the sternum, the xiphoid process (the small, pointy, lowest portion of the sternum), the ribs, and the clavicles. They're very strong, and because of their function, it would take them a good amount of time to heal, and to heal properly.

I think the most likely would be the costochondral separation. But, since Tim's injury is presenting as a bruised chest, I want to say that there's at least one break or fracture. The break in a bone and leaking of bone marrow would give the appearance of a bruise.

I don't know, though. It's difficult to say. It really could be a number of things. Plus, I'm not too sure, just because Lindy's scared. And if Lindy's worried, then I definitely am.

Sorry I was boring you with medical talk. It actually allows me to study while I post, which is weird, and I'll never do it again, I promise...


On to the Derek Roy Report.

Derek actually woke up this morning. SHOCKING. Because after that game, if I were him, I would've skipped this week, not last.

- Oh, hey! He's talking about The System!! Another shock!
- He's excited to play the Flyers, because of Marty and that like puke.
- He said that the practices can be short (45 minutes), up to 75-90 minutes.
- They are not allowed to have their cell phones on the ice.
- Has he ever checked out Rivet's six-pack. "Is that serious? Yeah, he's built."
- If he could live forever, what would he live for? "For my family." SUPER CUTE. MAJOR POINTS.
- He gets a Big Extra Meal with a side of chicken nuggets with sweet and sour sauce at McDonald's.
- Derek doesn't know what he'll be wearing to Level on Saturday, and says he won't be dancing.
- Funniest fan story? "I don't know... Let me get back to you on that one."
- How is Kyle? "He's good, he's good." Apparently he wants his own show on Kiss.

THAT WAS LAME, TOO.

BUT WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO WORK WHEN COOL THINGS HAPPEN? KISS IS THROWING A PARTY FOR DEREK AT LEVEL NIGHT CLUB ON SATURDAY. That's bull. I'm pissed. I mean, I suppose I could go after work, but of course my friend would have to be coming home from school on Saturday and she wants our group to go out for midnight pie, since that's a bit of a tradition with us. And I'm not so sure if I said to this friend, "LET'S GO CLUBBING 'CAUSE PRINCESS D IS OUT," she'd be down with it. Sad.

And to the girl who asked D if Craig has a six-pack?? WAY TO MAKE HIM SEEM EVEN MORE GAY. I'm pretty sure all the guys do in the locker room is check each other out. BUT, I do think I should e-mail Janet and include Derek's chunky monkey pic, and have her ask him if he has a six-pack, and when he says "yes," confront him with that gem. Think it would work??

But I'd love to Craig's six-pack any day. Hell, I'd pay to see it.



Yeah, that's right, Craig. Because Derek said that on the air, you're going to be hit on by teenagers and college students across Western New York. And all they'll want to see are your abs. I can't say I blame them, though.


Oh, and hey! While the Sabres can't win, I'M SO GLAD THE PIRATES CAN. Thank God that one of my teams is playing consistantly. And you should definitely go seen the renovations Anne and S(h)ara have done to Sabretooth's House. They're glorious.


Alright, kids. I'm out. And by out, I mean at the dining room table, still studying, instead of going out in the 30-degree, snowy weather. So, stay warm, loves. And if anyone hears anything about Timmy, txt me, please?? Thanks dears!!

What to say, what to say?

Well, I know I'm not going to say anything about that catastrophic kick that almost made me commit suicide during the Bills game.

Besides, why should I talk about that when there is a new Sabres injury to discuss? What injury is that, might you ask?

OH, ONLY DEREK ROY'S GROIN PULL.

Or his yeast infection, as my father said. I think that's pushing the envelope, myself. We say he's gay, or metro-sexual... Not transsexual. He's so harsh to my guys...

But anyways, I suggested to my mother that I make him some cookies, and this time I was deadly serious. I have an excuse to be in the area of his townhouse, since two of my good friends works in the office building about 500 feet away from his doorstep, and another friend is working on the construction of an apartment building going up across the street. SO IT'S ENTIRELY PLAUSIBLE THAT I REALLY AM "JUST IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD." Alas, my mother, since she had seen the infamous picture, reasoned that, because D's getting chunky, or was chunky, maybe some tofu brownies would be a better idea.

I don't like tofu, though, so unless Derek misses any games, he's not getting anything from me.

MJ gave me a good laugh, yesterday, though. When I found out that Derek was hurt, or at least missed practice, I texted her about it, and this was her response:

Oh no not princess d!! They are all falling apart on me!!

Okay, first of all, it rhymes. But she called him Princess D!! I love it!!! MJ, you're my heroine.


On another note, I found that car dealerships in Western New York are allowing people like me crazy fan-girls to find the Sabres a little bit more easily, these days...

Take, for example, DeLacy Ford:



And, for Exhibit B, I present, from Autoplace Nissan, via an internet dealer:



(That car that Paul now drives is an Infiniti FX35. Nice cars...)

I found the one of Paul when I was searching for a commercial that Kim saw, in which Paul was doing a Jason Pominville-esque promotion. That was the only thing returned to me. So then I ventured over to DeLacy's website to find some stuff about Jason, and I found some wonderful pictures....


Oh, and Ryan Miller is going to do the ceremonial lighting of the Christmas tree at Rotary Rink on Sunday at 5 pm. I saw something somewhere (maybe in the paper this morning?) that it's $100 per ticket... That's a bit steep, if you ask me, to watch a good looking guy throw a switch. Whatever, though, because I don't get to see it because I'll be at work. What a shame...


But that's about all the Sabres stuff I could dig up for today. Enjoy the snow!!

Derock the Vote? NO? Well, okay, maybe just vote..

This morning, when I woke up, I expected to be able to vote my lovely Sabres into the All-Star Game.

HOWEVER,

instead of the NHL being normal and putting links or whatever up on nhl.com, the homepage, to allow people to vote, I had to be all sneaky-like and find the address in old articles. I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THAT THIS MORNING. Well, obviously I made the time, but at the moment it is 8:05 am and I have to leave no later than 8:45, and as Kim nows, it takes me a ridiculously long time to get ready this early in the morning. I move about as slow as molasses.

So since there is no interesting hockey news, go vote your cute little butts off for Derek, Tommy, Teppo, and Ryan!!

Oh, wait, I lied. BRIERE IS HURT AGAIN!!!! Why am I excited, you might ask? Well, I'm only hoping that his injury lasts him about two weeks, because I'm going to the Sabres/Flyers game next Friday, and I am not the biggest Briere fan.

And there's a slight possibility I might be going to the Blues game tonight. If not, I'll probably post during intermissions. If so, then I'll post when I return home. But PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE let Jay McKee play. It's not right to deprive Buffalo's fans of him. We still love him. At least Anne and I do.

Oh, and this is just too funny: AHAHHAHHAHHHA Gloria Gaynor is going to be on the Today Show this morning. Oh, how I wish I could stay home from lab to sing hear her sing "I Will Survive." Only the best karaoke song... EVER!!

Funny Story...

So this afternoon, while Kim and I were venturing around Boston in the rain, we decided to enjoy a late lunch at Cheer's.

After our waiter (who boasted a slight resemblance to our beloved Paul Gaustad) took our order, I pulled out my phone to check my e-mail.

In my inbox, I saw this:

Kiss985Contest:  "Derek Roy/Vitamin Water"

I'm like, "What's this???"

So I open it up, and I literally gasp like I just saw Tim Connolly get laid out.  This is what I read:

Congratulations Cari!  You have won a case of Vitamin Water for your Derek Roy question.  We just need your contact information for our records.  Please reply with your address, phone number, and date of birth.  You can pick up your prize at 500 Corporate Parkway in Amherst (off of Maple Road) Monday through Friday 9am-5pm.

A;LKGHNAKWNGKAWHUETKAJBGKJAH  WHAT!?!?!?!?

I basically threw my phone at Kim and called my mother to tell her, and to have her and my father listen to the Derek Roy Report online, because, being in the middle of downtown Boston, and my computer being about 25 miles south in Norwell, I couldn't very well do that.

PLUS, I HAD FORGOTTEN WHAT I ASKED HIM.

Anyways, my mom listened, and said he thought my question was funny.  SO DEREK THINKS I'M FUNNY.  Which is good, because I am.  Or so I've heard.

You can listen to my question here.  Gaaaa I'm really excited about this.  It pretty much made my life.

And I wonder what flavors my case of Vitamin Water is going to contain...  And I wonder if a Derek Roy autograph is going to accompany my fluid intake for the month...

ANYWAYS.

We scoped out the area around Boston Commons to see where the Ritz (the Sabres' hotel) was, and we kinda sorta found it; it's not too hard, but we only saw the awning.  And since we won't be in Boston too much tomorrow, as we'll be in Portland(!!!!!!!), we at least have an idea of where to find our boys tomorrow.

And I can pretty much guess that Derek will be spending his off time on Newbury Street.  We'll have to meet up so he can buy me that Chanel coat that I want, along with the one from Juicy Couture and that Hermes bag.  Yeah, that'd be good.  I'd give him a fair trade in a case of Vitamin Water...  =]

Pirates pictures tomorrow!!

And it has come to my knowledge that our dear Timmykins is hurt again?  But that he's supposed to play tomorrow?  I'll believe it when I see it.  Seriously though, someone needs to call me tomorrow night and tell me if he's actually playing.  Because I need to know if I can wear my jersey with dignity on Saturday, or if I'm going to be ashamed of the name on my back...

It's Drew's Birthday.

First thing's first:  Happy Birthday, Drew!!

Again, I told Kim that I wanted to bake you a cake for your 23rd Birthday, but she is still of the opinion that baked goods are too stalker-ish, so I caved.  But Drew, understand that if I knew where your doorstep was, there'd have been a cake waiting for you this morning.  I could have even made it paste-flavored.  But anyways, I hope you get lots of ass for your birthday, because that's all any guy wants, oh, and a goal and a win would be nice, too, I suppose.

I still haven't completely forgiven you for the whole "mouse potato" thing yet, though...

But let's get down to business:

THE ANDREW PETERS SHOW, Star 102.5

(1)  Andrew seems to have a bit of a stuttering problem, which is really cute.  I don't really think he does, though; it's early.  I stutter in the morning, too.

(2)  Andrew lets his wife buy the Halloween candy, but she hides it from him.

(3)  Brian Campbell used to plan the Halloween parties for the team.  Petey says they probably aren't having one this year because of their schedule; he doesn't know the plan.  (We'll see what Derek says.)

(4)  Andrew insulted the guy on the radio.  He suggested that he wore a lot of drag for Halloween in his childhood.

(5)  He likes Entourage.  Big surprise.

THE DEREK ROY REPORT. Kiss 98.5

(1)  He was told that Adam Mair was trick-or-treating.

(2)  He refuses to go to HSBC Arena at sunrise.  He admits it probably is nice, but no.

(3)  Derek got the pigeon for his OT goal.

(4)  Would be a golfer if not a hockey player.

(5)  Thinks Petey is the funniest person on the team.  They try not to laugh at his first joke, otherwise he just keeps going, and going, and going...

(6)  He dresses from the left side up.  Crazy.

(7)  He likes brunettes more than blondes.  I have red hair...  Where do I fit in?

I got gipped...  Both shows were only 5 minutes.  Lame.

Oh, and the TBN reports that Timmmmmaaay could be back next week.  Kim and I were talking the other night and we decided that it would be fun to start a pool amongst the Sabres Blogosphere in regards to the next game Tim gets hurt during.  Seriously, that would be amazing.

My mother insists that he needs to have his own hospital wing, with his own little bed, and own private nursing staff.  WAITT!!  That could be a bad idea...  Well, they're all in the hospital, so I guess they could stock up on the needed vaccinations and antibiotics and what not...

And tell me why, every time I watch the Pirates play online they lose?  Granted, yesterday's loss was in overtime, but still.  I fell asleep during the first period (at a 0-0 tie), only to wake up about halfway through the second and find the score to the 2-1 Hartford.  Note to self:  Stay Awake.  But Gerbe tied it up at the end of the third, but they obvs blew that.  Whatever.  As long as they win next Friday while I'm there, that's alright.

Oh, and someone please try to deny the fact that Paul Gaustad is the most adorable grown man in the history of mankind.  Please.  Because I give you Exhibit A for the defense:

From today's Buffalo News:  

Paul Gaustad took a one-timer at the end of practice Wednesday, and it was a rocket.  The puck glanced off the goaltender's arm and continued into the net.

Gaustad raised his stick, smiled broadly and shouted, "I'm back!"

Cute!  You can't deny it.  I dare you to try.  And I'll win because MJ will be my lawyer, and we all know how she feels about Paul.

OH MY GOODNESS, I FORGOT AGAIN.  Two new-ish signings at Dave and Adam's have been posted.  I say new-ish because one is new, the other just got a date.

Tommy will be at their Transit location Tuesday, December 2nd.

DEREK WILL BE AT THEIR SHERIDAN LOCATION TUESDAY, DECEMBER 16th.

Is it fate that he's going to be there exactly 6 days before my birthday?  Probably not.  It's probably just coincidence, but seeing as how Thursdays are usually Cari + Derek = Fate Day, and all I could garnish from his interview this morning was that we both prefer brunettes, I'll take this.  It's his birthday present to me.  Yay!

That's it for coherent thoughts, so I'm off to Anatomy.  I'll post after the game, while I watch the replay of the Pirates playing in their pink jerseys.  And they're not just pink; they're HOT pink, which makes it even better, but they had to throw the black in there to man them up a bit, I guess...  Anyways, I'm taping it.  For those of you who care, it's on channel 13 at 8:30.

Ugh, and unfortunately, I'm going to miss the first two period of the Sabres game.  I hate having plans during Sabres games.  It does no good for my relationship with them...

I FEEL GUILTY WHEN I FALL FOR NON-SABRES...

...because, like I've said, I don't get over people too quickly. And I feel this odd Buffalo-allegiance to the Sabres. You know, the one where I live and die by how they're doing in the season, and when they're not playing, I'm thinking about them anyways. Call me crazy, but I call it die-hard, devoted love. So I feel guilty when I fall for a guy who has never had the pleasure of donning a Sabres jersey. And because of that, I don't often admit that I love guys from other teams. I can now, though, admit that I love Ryan Getzlaf, thanks to Anne over at Sabretooth's House, because of this:

(You have to admit that it's pretty sick when a kid from Regina, Saskatchewan wears a Sabres jersey. THOSE CITIES ARE OVER 1,600 MILES APART, but Ryan hearts the Sabres. No wonder he hangs out in Buffalo over the summer with Ryan Miller. RANDOM.)

THAT BEING SAID, a few seasons ago, when the dear Alex Ovechkin came on the scene, I was done for. And it's not that he's super good-looking or anything, but for the fact that I can speak, like, five word in Russian, and the fact that he's got the heaviest accent I've ever heard, and he bumbles through the English language, barely better than Jaro Spacek, and he's got his own fashion line. DOES THIS GUY GET ANY BETTER? He's a freaking hockey celebrity, and he loves fashion, in a completely non-Sean-Avery way. LOVE. And let's not forget that commercial he did with the vending machine, which somehow ended up on my cell phone...

Oh, wait. He does get better. He's a FREAKING ROCK STAR. Ovie and the Caps are now my second favorite... no, third favorite band in the NHL. (First is the band that Derek Roy and Ryan had down in Rochester (yeah, I know, AHL, but it's a technicality, people), and second is Invisible Children. What kind of Drew Stafford fan would I be if I didn't love his band?)

AND CAN I PLEASE SAY THAT JOSE THEODORE LOOKS FANTASTIC WITH EYELINER ON???


And you all are by no means to allow me to go back to my punk rock/skater/surfer/local band groupie days, okay??? Because those were ridiculous days. And I'm not bitter at all that a certain band I went to ELEMENTARY SCHOOL with got huge after I liked them from the beginning and now they're pricks. But anyways, Jose Theodore looks FANTASTIC. I said it. He looks like a cross of my acquaintance (he's been demoted from friend) Keith and Chris Daughtry...

And Ovie didn't look too shabby himself, as a punker:


He said he likes to shake his booty. =]

He also said that he won't shake his booty for a goal celebration. BOOOOO.

Here's the reason behind this whole post: Behind the Scenes with Alex Ovechkin. And be sure to watch the Rock the Red music video, too.

WHY CAN'T THE SABRES DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT???!

Oh, speaking of the Sabres, the TBN had this to report:

Centers Paul Gaustad (thumb), Tim Connolly (back) and Jochen Hecht (finger) continued making progress Sunday. Gaustad and Connolly had progressed so much that Ruff refused to rule out either player for tonight's game.

Please excuse me for a minute while I AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Okay. Carrying on:

However, there seems a better chance both would remain on the sidelines because there is no reason to hurry them back. It's early in the season, and the Sabres are winning without them. Ruff would need to take someone out of the lineup, which is difficult to justify when a team is undefeated in regulation.

"We've got decisions," Ruff said. "We want to make sure they're ready. The effort that the guys have put into the game, it's tough to take guys out right now."

As much as I want these guys back on the ice with the team, Lindy's right...

Whatever, though. WORLD JUNIORS ANNOUNCEMENT TODAY!!!! Read this if you haven't already. Ryan over at the Goose's Roost nailed it right on the head.

And while it seems like we may just steamroll over the Sens tonight, you can never underestimate a bad, bad team. Look at how we did a few years back, before the lockout. We sucked. We were at the bottom of the league, and it seemed we couldn't beat anyone. But we could be the top teams in the leage. I'm just hoping (and that's more or less reassuring myself) that the Sabres are as humble as they are, and will actually show up for tonight's game, because if they don't, the Sens are desperate for a win, and they'll get it if we're not ready.

That being said, GO SABRES!!

IS IT JUST ME??

Or is there a rash of strange injuries going around the league this year?

First, it's Erik Johnson's inability to remove his foot from a gas pedal correctly, and tore his ACL AND MCL.  Nice, Erik.  Nice.

Then, it's Timmykins and his effed up back.  We all know it's from laying on bar floors, and not from getting hit in Roberval.

Next, we've got the Sabres' rash of finger injuries, with Paul tearing his thumb up, and Jochen shattering the tip of his middle finger.  Do you realize that if they had to have their fingers splinted, Jochen would be flipping Paul off permanently, and all Paul would be able to do would be to give Jochen a thumbs up?  hahahahah.

Then, I found out last night that Daniel Briere (ew) is out for about a month with a torn abdominal muscle.  Does anyone remember what happened to Danny while he was here?  That's right, folks, he had an inguinal hernia.  That's a torn abdominal muscle, where the intestines begin to protrude through the abdominal wall, if you didn't know.  So I'm thinking the surgical procedure to patch the wall has given in...

(I'm not sure if I like Danny, or if I hate him.  I think I'm indifferent.  I liked him while he was here, and yeah, he's great, but I hated the situation in which he left, and I'm kinda bitter with him about it, so idk.  But really, I dislike him like I dislike Hasek.  And I used to think I was going to marry Hasek.  Hey, I was five.  I didn't know any better.)

And I also see that Blues goalie Manny Legace is on the shelf, no thanks to Sarah Palin.  This is what TSN reports:

The Alaska governor dropped the ceremonial first puck before the Blues hosted the Los Angeles Kings.  A narrow carpet walkway was placed from the gate at the Blues bench to centre ice for Palin, her husband and two of her daughters.

Just before the ceremony, Legace was the first player onto the ice for St. Louis.  A team official pointed to the carpet.  But Legace said the official moved his own foot from the carpet just as Legace stepped down, causing the carpet to slide.

Legace fell, then gingerly made his way to the crease.

Sarah Palin is hurting our players.  Nice hockey mom.

But these injuries are just weird.  Right?  I mean, take a gander at exactly how many injuries there are in the league.  That's a lot.  And hahaha Gregory Campbell is hurt.  OOOH and another bizaar one?  Ryan Getzlaf has an impacted tooth.

And what's up with all this "Undisclosed Injury" crap??  I thought all injuries had to be disclosed?

Well, anyways, I won't be posting about the game tonight until midnight, or so, when I get home from work, so I probably won't be posting.  But definitely tomorrow.

Go Sabres!!

Updates, and My 100 Things

Tim Connolly is on the mend!!  Still not 100%, but he's getting there.  But, hey, he's not dead yet!!

Paul Gaustad and Jochen Hecht participated in practice.  Paul did a little bit with the stick, while Jochen merely skated.  At least it's something.

I found a new Sabres news outlet.  And no, I won't share it!  =]  It's not the most obvious for sports news, but it does give an interesting view into Sabres matters.  I'll be posting with things from this source in the very near future.

DON'T FORGET TONIGHT'S GAME IS ON VERSUS.  Yuck.

And because Kim started a 50 things about herself, I guess I'll do it, too, but I'm actually going to do 100, because I have ample amount of time to come up with 100.  Here's the first 33:

(1)  Like I've mentioned, I have red hair.  Not bright, fire engine, Carrot Top-esque red, but more of an auburn-ish chestnut red.  And I'm covered in freckles, and my skin is fair with a rosy undertone.  But guess what?  I'm not Irish.  Well, okay, one person in my very distant lineage is Irish, but that's it.  Otherwise, I'm mostly German, British, and Canadian.

(2)  If I could be in any profession, regardless of job availability/security, income, or my ability, I'd either be a wedding planner or an interior designer/house flipper.  What fun would those jobs be?!

(3)  I insist on taking funny/ridiculous pictures when I go out, no matter where I may be.  Don't believe me?  Just look at my facebook.

(4)  I can be an extreme neat-freak, but also the messiest person ever.  I insist that the entire house be clean, but my bedroom looks like the scene of World War III.

(5)  No one can spell my name right.  Not even a single part of it.  My own grandmother didn't get it right until I hit high school.

(6)  I have a very fat cat named Delilah, and I love her to death.  She chases squirrels, fights dogs, and terrifies every other cat in the neighborhood.  She's a beast in the likes of Danny Paille.

(7)  When deciding where to go to college, all but three of my choices (those being Albany, Brown, and Bowling Green) were in cities or very close to where I have friends or family (i.e. Michigan State, Georgia State, Northeastern (I know, MIKE RYAN!!) and Boston College, to name a few).

(8)  I went to Germany on a school trip in high school.  It was the most amazing two weeks of my life.

(9)  I have genetically terrible teeth.  I've had countless fillings, five caps when I was little, braces twice, and I was, at one point, a candidate for jaw surgery.  I still have braces at almost 20 years of age, and the only thing that's gone right with my teeth is the fact that my wisdom teeth grew in straight.

(10)  I drink way too much Dr. Pepper, apple cider, and Starbucks.  I'm probably an addict.

(11)  I'm an advocate for the cause of bringing an H&M to the Buffalo area.  I'm tired of driving to Rochester every time I want to shop there.

(12)  Despite having the capability of remembering the singer/band, song title, and lyrics to most songs, and knowing directions around the greater Buffalo area at will, I have a hard time remembering very simple things, or comprehending chemisty.

(13)  TV on DVD is quite possibly--in my opinion--the worst thing ever invented.  I can't get enough of my shows, especially Entourage, The Tudors, Gossip Girl, and Sex and the City.  My guilty pleasures.  =]

(14)  I love picking out shirt and tie combos.  When my brother got his new job I went shopping with him, as his fashion consultant.  Too bad we have different taste in clothing.  (Oh, and I hate, hate, hate short-sleeved dress shirts, and shirts with French collars.)

(15)  If I couldn't text or go online on my phone, I'd die.

(16)  I sing along to the jingles on commercials, all the time.  It drives my family crazy.

(17)  Certain members of my family also thought I was crazy when I decided to paint my bedroom silver.  It turned out really cool, actually, and yes, I tend to be a bit flashy.  I live it up.

(18)  Law and Order, House, or NCIS marathons ruin my plans.  If I see a marathon, I get nothing done--nothing at all--the entire day.  Good thing I didn't notice the one I'm watching now until after school.

(19)  I love to bake.  I've been told my cookies are quite possibly the world's greatest.

(20)  I'm afraid of heights, but I'll sit front-seat on roller-coasters in a heart beat.

(21)  I have this (sorta) thing for cowboys...  Enough said.

(22)  Gay guys like to play with my hair, more than usual.  When I was a secretary at the nursing home I work at, every gay guy who ever worked on my unit (4 of them, actually) played with my hair every time I was there.

(23)  Scary movies (legit scary ones; not the ones with the Wayans brothers) scare the living daylights out of me, yet I have this sick compulsion to watch them, either (a) in theaters, or (b) at home, alone, in the middle of the night, with all the lights off.  Me = Stupid.

(24)  I get gipped on birthday and Christmas presents every year.  It's because my birthday is December 22nd.

(25)  I like all kinds of music, so I can never pick a favorite band, singer, or song if asked.  So don't ask me.

(26)  I've never ridden a city bus in my life.  Well, not in North America, at least.  Taxis, subways, trains, and planes, yes, but no busses that weren't yellow.

(27)  I'd love to get a tattoo, but three things prevent me from doing so:  (1) I'm petrified of needles, (2) I'm afraid I'd hate it down the road, and (3) working in a nursing home has exposed me to the effects of aging on skin, so no.  (Although, I'd probably get my favorite song lyric inked on my right foot.)

(28)  I love cold weather because of the wonderful fashion accessories:  coats, scarves, beanies, mittens, fingerless gloves, and let's not forget Uggs!  (I have four pairs; excessive, I know.)

(29)  I know the songs from all of the classic Disney movies by heart.

(30)  I can pretty much quote the entire film of both Mean Girls and Napoleon Dynamite.

(31)  Earlier I said I was addicted to Starbucks.  That being said, I don't like coffee.  I love their tea and their hot chocolate, though.

(32)  I love nothing more that curling up on the coach under my down blanket and watching movies all day in the dead of winter.

(33)  I'm obsessed with all things black, silver, charcoal grey, hot pink, royal blue, mustard yellow, and zebra print.  Love.

Enjoy the game in a few hours, and I'll either post later tonight (if I get my anatomy work done), or tomorrow morning.

What Defines a "Good-Looking Ear?"

It's not very often that you'll find me ripping on Drew Stafford, because, come on, look at him. How can I rip a guy that cute, with that smirk, who would probably kick my ass despite the fact that I'm a girl.

In the TBN today, there's a snippet about Drew:

Stafford suffered what's termed "cauliflower ear," a common injury among boxers and wrestlers, from a blow during a fight last week in Minnesota. He's had his left ear drained twice and stuffed with bandages.

"It was more a precautionary thing," Stafford said. "I didn't want to have an ear that's looked like I've gone a few rounds. I wanted to make sure I had a decent-looking ear."

Drew, I had no idea you were so vain. But, I suppose since cauliflower ear could potentially look like this:



I'm glad that you took measures to keep yourself looking like this:



Or, better yet, like this:




So, are you like best friends with Sidney now??? Could you maybe possibly slip my phone number into his phone??? That'd be great. Thanks.



A few other off-topic things:

Here's a link to the old, old, old bout between Rob Ray and Craig Rivet. Sorry, Craig, but Rob most definitely got the best of you.

The final roster and captaincy is supposed to be announced today, and I have class. Maybe I'll skip and blog my reactions? And maybe do some shopping? I think that sounds pretty good to me. I mean, it's only nutrition. Not that difficult of a subject.

And Dave and Adam's Card World has a couple notable signings coming up:
Craig Rivet, Tuesday October 28th, 7-9 pm, Transit Road location
Jason Pominville, Wednesday October 29th, 7-9 pm, Sheridan Drive location

Please, please, please! if you plan on going to one of these signings, you absolutely have to go to D&A's website because tickets may or may not be required, and there is a cost involved.

Oh, and please also don't hold it against me, because I was completely ignorant of the autograph session they had with one Nathan Gerbe. SORRRRRYYY. I totally would've gone myself.

'Til later.