Thursday, December 11

I AM THE VENGEANCE IN THE NIGHT; I... AM... GAUSTAD.


We all know that my dear Kim is just smitten with one Paul Gaustad.

So this morning, when I saw that spectacular picture of Goose, I texted her immediately.

This is what communication has transpired between us throughout the day:


Cari, 08:31: Have you seen the Sports section today, dear?

Kim, 08:37: No, I'm out with my momma.

Cari, 08:38: Ohhhh dear. Well... You'll love it.

Cari, 08:39: [Picture message sent, containing the image of Paul and the headline "Sauce from the Goose"]

Kim, 09:12: The picture you sent me didn't come through.

Cari, 09:12: Ughh I'll try it again.

Cari, 12:26: TIM CONNOLLY LOOK-A-LIKE AT BURGER KING!!

Kim, 12:27: Haha Are you sure it wasn't him? Maybe he was eating away his pain...

Cari, 12:38: I'm sure. He had hair and was smoking.

Kim, 12:38: Well, it would've been a great scenario.

Cari, 12:39: I know, right?

Cari, 13:37: Did you ever get that picture?

Kim, 15:01: No, it never came.

Cari, 15:02: Ughh Well, did you see the newspaper?

Kim, 15:02: No, I'm babysitting and they don't get the paper.

Cari, 15:03: Ohhhh I'll try it again because it is vital that you see it stat.

Kim, 15:03: Okay.

Cari, 15:03: [Second attempt to send said picture of Paul]

Kim, 18:52: I saw the picture in the paper. Oh, hot damn, he looks hot!

Cari, 20:58: OMGAH doesn't he??? Ughhh I'd love it if I saw him pummeling someone like that on the street...

Kim, 21:20: Haha Well, see, then he'd probably get arrested for battery.

Cari, 21:21: Yeah, but so what? It'd be hot. And he'd probably just be beating a criminal or defending our honor.

Kim, 21:22: Or saving the world from polluters.

Cari, 21:23: Exactly... So who could throw him in jail for that?

Kim, 21:23: Good point. He'd probably end up with a key to the city.

Cari, 21:34: Oh, most definitely. He's seriously like Batman.


So, basically, I think that's how things should work in Buffalo. Can the BPD get a big searchlight atop 74 Franklin Street, and emblazon a large 28, or maybe a flying goose, or something of the like, upon the dark, winter sky?? I think it would work out quite well.

OH! And I'm pretty much fed up that my picture message didn't send. And since, being the genius that I am, I didn't try to send a picture to anyone else, I don't know if Verizon is to blame, or if it's Kim's phone's fault, and AT&T is to blame. They both suck at the moment, then...

And if you're wondering, we normally text about four times as much as that throughout the day. I was in Canada for part of the day and wasn't texting (I JUST LOVE BEING DETAINED AT THE BORDER), and then I was driving around for a while, and not texting while driving for a change... But yeah, this was a slow day for us...

6 comments:

Caroline said...

HAHA nice title. :D

Jill said...

HA!!! I CAN SEE IT NOW...

Kim said...

Way to make us sound like the only thing we talk about is the Sabres...Oh wait that's right that IS all we talk about.

Cari said...

Oh wait that's right that IS all we talk about.

Ughhh I got in a huge fight with my mother and brother about that last night. Literally, right after I wrote this.

They were bitching that it's all I talk about, so I finally got sick of it and snapped. I said, "Well I'm sorry if I don't feel like talking about school, because school sucks. I'm sorry if I don't want to talk about work, because I hate work. And sorry if the Sabres are the only thing I feel like talking about, because the Sabres make me happy, even when they suck."

I stormed off and I heard my mother say, "Oops... We hurt her feelings..."

I WAS SO PISSED OFF AT THEM. It almost made me want my father to come home. And I did say almost.

Shelby Rose said...

I think a flying goose would be a wonderful symbol to show in Buffalo's night sky. Just think - there'd be no crime while Goose is saving the world!

Kim said...

Paul can be a superhero on one condition, that I get to be the damsel in distress that he saves over and over while, at the same time, falling madly in love with her.