Friday, December 5

I'M CALLING YOU OUT

Okay, Sabres. You've had your fun. And by fun, I mean toying with the hearts of countless people throughout Western New York, Southern Ontario, and across the country.

AND WE DON'T APPRECIATE IT.

In fact, it's downright despicable. I really don't care for how you've been playing, at all. Goaltending? Needs to be better. Consistent, but yet, needs to be better. Defense? Don't even get me started. Offense? Ditto.

First of all, DEREK ROY I TOLD YOU THAT YOU CAN'T BE FRIENDS WITH ANYONE. Not the coach who led you to the Memorial Cup, no one. Know why? Because he coaches Gregory Campbell. YOU CAN'T BE FRIENDS WITH HIM. Wanna know why? Because he could have single-handedly beat you last night. That's why.

Anyways...

I mean, something is obviously wrong in the locker room. I, for one, don't think it's Lindy Ruff's fault. The guys don't have it in them. I don't know why, but they just don't. Somehow, though, I honestly feel like management might call for Lindy's head. But I don't think Regier would allow Ruff to be axed; they've been together too long, and they were together when this team didn't make the playoffs, what, three seasons in a row? Regier, as we are all too well aware, is not one to jump the gun, so I really believe that Ruff's job is safe, and that's fine by me, because he is an elite coach.

That being said, I'll refer to my comment about the guys just not showing up. What's my solution to that? Make some phone calls to Portland. Get Nathan Gerbe on a plane ASAP. If I were Lindy, I'd stick with the plan of benching guys. I'm still on the Bench Derek Roy Bandwagon. He most definitely needs to play better (and obviously my theory of embarrassing him didn't work as well as I had hoped). But seriously. Rotate Gerbe in for the guys we are very much underachieving this year. Oh, wait... That's pretty much everyone except for Vanek, and I'll throw MacArthur in there (strictly because of his numbers) and Mancari (because he's played pretty well). And like I said, don't even get me started on the D. Seriously, bench them all. Play Paetsch and Weber in Lydman and Tallinder's spots for a few games, and then in Sekera and Spacek's, and then Numminen's. I won't throw Rivet in there because he's been battling injuries all season, but still.

SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE.

We obviously have to find what's wrong with this team, and we have to find it now. Because as it stands, playoff-wise, we're already on the outside. And I'm not so sure I can take another Sabre-less late spring.

Like I said to Anne today, I seriously want to jump a plane to Tampa when I drop my brother off at the airport this morning. I really want to go down there, smack every single Buffalo Sabre across the face, and then proceed to bawl my eyes out and throw a hissy fit to make them see just how much their sucking affects me.



Oh, my God. If I talk about them any more I think I actually might start crying. Either that, or my couch pillows and other household objects may suddenly be able to fly...



So, I think, instead of talking about those men who shall not be named (Sounds like Harry Potter, eh? I think I might use Kim's method: ******.), I think I'm just going to post ridiculous pictures of them, and talk about my boyfriends from the other teams.

Here goes.

So, in last night's game, my Florida boyfriend, the beautiful David Booth did what? Nothing. Oh, that's right, because he didn't play, because he has some shoulder injury.

WHY IS IT THAT THE ONES I LIKE ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS GET HURT????

But Marcus Naslund scored for the Rangers, neither of my goalie BF's played in the Islanders/Caps game, both Staal brothers let me down in their matchup, Shea Weber netted a goal, Todd Fedoruk did as well, and that's it. Well I guess I pretty much got stood up across the board. But thank you, Marcus, Shea, and Todd, for trying to cheer me up. But, alas, it didn't work.

At least Tampa lost... But, wait, I don't think that will matter since they absolutely steamrolled us when they were up here last.

Umm, so a picture...

So I lied. I can't look at my pictures of the ****** without getting all kinds of upset. Well, I'll put up a picture of one of my guys who didn't let me down last night:

The Pirates couldn't possibly let me down last night because they didn't play.



In fact, they only made me love them more.

While the Sabres are out making millions by playing terribly and galavanting on the beach and Chippewa, the most adorable hockey players every (coughTHEPIRATEScough) are doing charity work. Yeah, that's right, and making the days of countless children, grown men, and adoring women.

Three of the four Mikey-Poo's in Portland (Card, Funk, and Kostka), along with Derek Whitmore unveiled the newly remodeled Dorothy Elizabeth room at Gary's House, a Ronald McDonald-esque house, in Portland. They also decorated for Christmas.

And then Tim Kennedy (who looks like a child himself) and Jimmy Bonneau did a signing.

The Pirates are my new hockey loves.

Take that, Sabres. Oh, and Derek Roy? I'm breaking up with you.

4 comments:

Jill said...

Cari... do need a shoulder? I know sometimes breaking up can be an angry pleasure at first but then it hits you later.

Cari said...

do need a shoulder? I know sometimes breaking up can be an angry pleasure at first but then it hits you later.

It's already hit me... I'm really upset. But I plan on taking him back as soon as the Sabres start playing better...

Kim said...

OH MY GOD, the three mikes together is like three out of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, I'm surprised the camera didn't explode. But look who else is in there one of my Portland boyfriends, oh Derek you're so pretty and no, it's not Derek from the ****** it's Derek from my favorite team who has now replaced the ******. Oh and JIMMY I LOVE UUUUUUUU.

Cari said...

the three mikes together is like three out of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, I'm surprised the camera didn't explode.

AHHH AND IT'S THE GORGEOUS ONES, NO LESS. =]