FORBIDDEN FRUIT

Okay, so there's no new Sabres news to go around, and I've got no stories that I can think of that are worth sharing--

(Except that Drew Stafford and I are now friends on Facebook. My friend Brittany is home for the week from Fredonia, and encouraged me to friend her new friend, so I did. I'm waiting on replies from Gerbe Derby, Funker, and Marky Mark.)

--so I've decided to comment on my (now, not-so-) secret loves from around the league. It also doesn't hurt that it occupies my sick-self for the morning. These aren't just spur-of-the-moment, I need something to post about things I pulled out of the air. I've actually liked these guys for a while, but never really felt like fessing up to it... Most of them can fall in to that category, at least... And the choosing of these boyfriends is purely shallow in method; no consideration of actual skill has entered my mind. Well, anyways, here goes:


Anaheim (Mighty) Ducks
I had a hard time choosing between Ryan Getzlaf and Brendan Morrison. What made me choose, though? Well, Ryan kinda reminds me of a teacher of mine from high school. I loved this teacher; he was awesome, and one of the only history teachers who actually made me like learning about it. But, he's not so asthetically pleasing, so I'm going to go with Brendan Morrison.

Atlanta Thrashers
(Off-topic comment, first: I cannot stand Garnet Exelby, but if you liked Anchorman, watch this.)
I really don't want to like a guy that I can't like anyone that shares a locker room with Chris Thorburn. I can't stand him. He's a jerk, and a dirty player. But, to hold to my little plan here, I'll go with Zach Bogosian. He's 18. That's disgusting.

Boston Bruins
I have to give credit where credit is due, so I have to say that Matt Hunwick, with his sun-bleached, curly locks, definitely gave me a run for my money, but my "loyalties" lie with Andrew Ferrence. He's so nice to look at, and it doesn't hurt that he and Goose both played for the Portland Winter Hawks.

Calgary Flames
Cory Sarich, hands down. I was sweating him since Day One of his Sabres career. I've told you once, and I'll tell you again, I fall hard for my Sabes. And that love never leaves me. Rhett Warrener can be thrown in there, too, I suppose.

Carolina Hurricanes
I don't know if I want to pick one, or at least fess up to it... But whatever. Umm, Eric Staal. Has there ever been an easier decision? Although, Cam Ward is a cutie... And when Mike Ryan is up from Albany, he's definitely a winner.

Chicago Blackhawks
I've got to go with MJ on this one. It's a no-brainer with Jonathan Toews. I was, for an instant, considering making it official with Brian Campbell, but I think I have to let my favorite hockey-playing redhead go...

Colorado Avalanche
Is it a rule of thumb that hot guys have hot friends? Because in Ryan Miller's case, it holds true. I like the fact that he brought my attention to John-Michael Liles. So, Ryan, thanks. A lot.

Columbus Blue Jackets
Helloooo Christian Backman. Mike Peca's still really handsome, but he was a love of my old friend Shauna back in, like, kindergarten. He's just been hanging around my life for too long. I need to move on.

Dallas Stars
So a while back, I would've said Mike Modano. Then it would've been Brad Richards. But now? Loui Eriksson.

Detroit Red Wings
Seriously, I don't know what's gotten into me lately... I've always been partial to guys with dark hair, dark eyes, yada, yada, yada... But what's with this influx of blondes? Nothing against blondes, but what gives? Here's the next one: Darren Helm.

Edmonton Oilers
(Can I just say that whoever the Oilers hired to design their website is the winner? They make it so much easier to compare the guys on the team... All the other teams should employ this genius as well.) I'm still going to have to go with one of my original Western Conference Loves... Ethan Moreau. Although, Kyle Brodziak and Ales Hemsky are runners-up.

Florida Panthers
So I'm obviously not going to say Stephen Weiss or Gregory Campbell. And I'd love to say Stefan Meyer, but he's technically on the Amerks' roster. So that leaves me with a decision to make. But it's a pretty easy one to make when I'm presented with one David Booth.

Los Angeles Kings
So, there weren't a whole lot of decent options out in LA, as far as I'm concerned, so I went with my default choice: Marc-Andre Cliche. I like that his last name is Cliche. idk....

Minnesota Wild
I typically tend to stray away from guys who are younger than me (but you wouldn't know it from some of my choices already...), just because I think it's weird, but I'll make an exception for Colton Gillies, even though I don't like his name.

Montreal Canadiens
Now, I hate the Canadiens as much as the next Buffalo girl, but man, oh man, do I love Canadians. But that actually has nothing to do with my guy from Montreal, because he's actually from Smithtown, NY. Seeing that he's from Long Island, he probably wasn't a Sabres fan growing up, though, but I'll let Christopher Higgins slide.

Nashville Predators
I can immediately cross off Scott Nichol, just because he's dirty, nasty, and gave Tim Connolly his initial concussion way back when. BUT, I can't hold that against his teammate, Shea Weber. He doesn't look too great in his headshot, either, but believe, me, he's very attractive.

(Wow, I didn't realize how long this endeavor would take me... Good thing TNT has a good line-up of daytime TV...)

New Jersey Devils
I fell in love with Dainius Zubrus the moment I saw his face. And, again, I don't let go easily.

New York Islanders
Ummm, Rick DiPietro. Duh...

New York Rangers
Do I even have to contemplate which Ranger is the best looking when the gorgeoud Marcus Naslund is on the roster??? Didn't think so...

Ottawa Senators
I actually think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit... But if a decision must be made, a decision must be made. If one of my earlier posts wasn't evidence enough, let me remind you: Antoine Vermette.

Philadelphia Flyers
Martin Biron, no explanation necessary.

Phoenix Coyotes
Again with this blonde thing.. Well, I guess next time I go out to Arizona to visit Michelle, I'll have to go to a Coyotes game just to see Todd Fedoruk.

Pittsburgh Penguins
So, as tempted as I am to say Sidney Crosby, I have to say Jordin Staal. Their parents are spectacular...

San Jose Sharks
If I would've made this decision years ago, I would've said Joe Thornton for Boston. But, since he's playing for the Sharks now, and I'm kinda over him, I'm going with Torrey Mitchell.

St. Louis Blues
I love Jay McKee, as you're all well aware. Again, no explanation necessary.

Tampa Bay Lightning
So he's got a big nose? Vincent Lecavalier is gorgeous, generous, and classy. Those always win.

Toronto Maple Leafs
Do I have to? Oh, alright... I have to make another age-exception with this choice, seeing that he's one day short of a year younger than my cousin Todd, who is a month and a half older than me. Don't judge Luke Schenn by his headshot, though. He's really adorable.

Vancouver Canucks
If there were any team to be loaded with good-looking guys (other than the Sabres), I'm glad it's Vancouver. My favorite west coast and Canadian team... Well, we all know how I feel about Taylor "Bedroom Eyes" Pyatt and Steve "Big Bear" Bernier, but I most definitely have to go with the beautiful Ryan Kessler.

Washington Capitals
I absolutely love his hair.... He's the Christian Siriano of the NHL... Jose Theodore, no doubt.

Well, there it is. I'm done. And I'm going to take a nap because I feel like poop. I think my head is going to explode if I sneeze one more time, or my trachea is going to shatter if I cough again. Yikes... I need to get it together before the game tomorrow night...