Paul: Hello?
Cari: Hey, Paul, it's me.
Paul: Oh, hey!! How are you?
Cari: I'm good, but Paul? Why do you have bunny ears on?
Paul: Oh, Cari, don't you know that Friday is Halloween? I have to find my costume still, you know.
Cari: So what are you trying to be with that getup? A modest cross between a Chippendales dancer and a Playboy Bunny?
Paul: How'd you guess?
Cari: It's not that difficult... Anyways, let me get to why I called. Paul, are you healthy?
Paul: Well, I don't know. Ultimately, that's up to Lindy.
Cari: Well, please decide, because if you or Timmy aren't ready to play tomorrow night, and Adam does get suspended for his shenanigans--oh my God, I just thought of this, but if Adam does get suspended, who's going to take care of the Man Children?--but if he does get suspended, we need another guy, and it had better be one of you.
Paul: Cari, we'll have to cross that bridge when we get to it. The NHL is quote-unquote investigating is, so...
Cari: Well, I don't trust the NHL. I'm hoping at most they'll slap him with a fine, but Paul, what if? Who would we get from Portland? Mark? So we can risk waiving him again? No thank you.
Paul: Stop being such a worry wart. You're upsetting my aura. Hey, where are my milk and cookies for being hurt? I never got them. I thought you were going to leave them on my doorstep for me?
Cari: Kim wouldn't let me. She said that would be crossing the line.
Paul: They're cookies. Cookies never cross the line.
Cari: Good to know. But Paul?
Paul: Yes, Cari?
Cari: Hurry back, please. And next time don't punch people too hard. Oh, and Paul?
Paul: Yes, Cari?
Cari: Can you tell your BFF Ryan that he's kicking ass in the TSN Power Rankings? And ESPN's for that matter?
Paul: Sure.
Cari: And you didn't tell me who would watch Danny and Clarke in the event of Adam's absence...
Paul: Um, I don't know for sure... Maybe Jaro?
Cari: JARO??!! He'd probably try to lure them into the shower room with the cookies I'd make for you and then he'd fillet them, or something. And he'd probably hang Mr. Snuffles on a plaque above his mantle... No, Jaro; I love you, but no.
Paul: Drew, maybe?
Cari: Are you kidding me? Drew eats paste.
Paul: Fine. How about I give the job to the equipment guys?
Cari: They think a taxidermic pigeon is funny. Let me think, NO.
Paul: Well, who do you suggest then?
Cari: Yourself. Duh. So get healthy.
Paul: I'm working on it.
Cari: I'm going to school now. I'll talk to you later, okay? Bye.
Paul: Bye...
Cari: (in a txt to Paul) Oh, and tell Pommers I won't see him tonight at Dave and Adam's because I have trip preparations to commence. And tell Petey that I'll be listening to him on Star 102.5 tomorrow at 8:10, but I might have to turn him off for Derek. Okay? Thanks Paul!
5 comments:
hahah, that was great!
They're cookies. Cookies never cross the line.
Never truer words spoken.
Paul: Drew, maybe?
Cari: Are you kidding me? Drew eats paste.
LOL! What a bad influence for the kiddies.
Never truer words spoken.
Cookies make everyone feel better. Every time a Sabre gets hurt, I feel like someone (namely, me) should bake them cookies.
They may not be on his diet... LOL!
Everyone has room in their diets for cookies...
What a bad influence for the kiddies.
HE IS A BAD INFLUENCE. A bad, bad influence. But I still love him! Whenever I watch Bueller's Day Off, during the scene where Jeanie is in the police station, and Charlie Sheen is sitting there in his bad-ass leather jacket, picking his fingernails with his pocket knife... That's how I imagine Drew. Total bad-ass.
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